A Change Is Coming
Updated: May 19
The first couple of months of 2021 has been a reflective one for me. I could feel changes happening within myself that I needed to dive into deeper and focus on without outside distraction. I stepped away from social media, I didn't speak or contact anyone and went into this solitude state of mind. Sort of like a hibernation. A cocoon. Let's just say it wasn't all peaceful either. During this time I was obligated to look at myself in the mirror and see who I was (or who I thought I was) and be super present with where I am now and where I would like to see myself in the future. During this time, my personal understandings about life changed and my overall ideas about purpose and gratitude while being alive on this planet at this time began to shift. There was a new era coming and I can smell it coming.
So during this time, I removed myself from basically any kind of outside influences and allowed myself to just do me. I continued to let my hair grow, I got my septum pierced, something I had wanted for years (long before their trendiness today). I was in a space where I could do those little things for myself, that working everyday in an office or working a gig had previously prevented me in some kind of way from doing. My perspective on things was shifting as new agreements were being established during this time of much needed rest and healing. Eventually looking at pictures of myself from just a year ago looked like I was looking at baby pictures of myself. It was a different version of myself that I didn't really feel exactly connected to anymore. So many other experiences happened to me during this solitude time, but I'll save that for the book. ;)
I don't want to rush this time and I feel like I am still moving through this state of personal evolution. Everyday is a new opportunity for growth and exploration in new ways. Like being born again and becoming a child all over again. This time has allowed me to dig deeper into my goals and what I want to do in this world. Even if it is just growing my avocado trees and sitting at the beach and staring out into the ocean or recording more music, creating my own projects for film, and building my brand in new tangible ways. Even doing something completely new. I'm not obligated to anyone's approval or any desire to keep up with appearances. Only collaborating, creating, expressing. Validation for the idea of purpose is not the primary focus for me in this time, but expressing a true reflection of being alive and just having a deeper sense of gratitude and compassion for life every chance I get to wake up and work on myself a little while longer each day. The impact of these changes have hit me in deeper ways that I was not able to even grasp before. I feel sometimes in our lifetime, we have to have these break down (break it down) moments in our lives to get to that break through (break out) of what we ultimately need for ourselves to move forward. It's the Crime Boss waiting for you at the end of the game. Either you defeat them and start the game over again with a few new cheat codes, or you die and it's "game over".
Every time I feel I have moved toward a more authentic version of myself, things change just a bit more. Life is constantly changing all around us. The world I currently live is a reflection of my own thoughts, views, and personal beliefs about myself which reverberate throughout the universe to present back to me the reality of my own dream, whether I'm aware of this or not. Where I choose to go is based on the agreement I have made with my own heart. Ultimately the creator has the final say. So everyday I get to rise up again, I want to apply the gifts and tools the creator has given me since birth to the best of my ability. A change is truly coming...Round 2